Hoe Things

Once we become converted to God, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, do we hide who we were; remove our tattoos, delete the old text messages of when we texted that nigga bout sucking his dick? Do we pick up our cucumber sandwiches and hide that we ate pork and salad and drunk bottles of alcohol amongst other drinks? 

Hmm, this is a serious question. Can we be Christian and still remember where we came from? The midnight hours of raw sex, skin to skin, with a nigga who wasn’t your husband but somebody else’s. Wasted time exchanging ourselves for time currency. The moments when we snuck our hands into a classmates back bag stealing they shit. Or oh the time when you let a nigga fuck you on the beach cuz his shirt said he was a police. 

Surely when I was a child I behaved as one. Now the old things are put away, but are they thrown away? I wonder what I will tell my niece why I dance the way I do when I hear nothing but the blood of Jesus? 

Will I tell her it’s because he died for me a sinner? Will I pull outs My old things and tell her I dance cuz He saved me from doing hoe shit that was going to send my ass to hell? Or do I say nothing. And let her find out herself and  let her reach that epiphany when Kirk Franklin sings I sing because I’m free? 

Do I owe those behind me the legacy of my wounds? Or if not them, do I owe God that? To him who much is forgiven, him who loves most. 

And if we do forget what happens? Do we walk around smelling of cinnamon and mint, taking the eye doodoo out of people’s eyes, turning hoes to housewives, redeeming the jailhouse bird as we ourselves slowly regress. 

I once heard some shit, and I think it’s true; if the past is continuously erased, you will have nothing to learn from. Once saved doesn’t mean always saved cuz the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob will test you continually.

Our lives are not games. Life is not a game. Our souls and spirits and generations of bodies hang in the balance or will hang on the trees. It is too expensive a move to forget the past. Lest ye forget, and judge. Then shall ye be judged with the same measure. 

Museums must be built with the stoning on the wall. The song must commemorate them when they find their way out of the Forrest out of the gingerbread house out of sun worship out of the theory of evolution out of Walmart out of the fraternity out of the lodge and  off the mothafucking grid. 

Are you la tabula Rosa? Do you turn a new leaf cuz you turnt a new trick?


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Me Too

  The “Me Too Movement,” was successful in detailing the experiences of individuals across the United States who had either and ever been assaulted or harassed. It prompted more people than ever in the United States to examine their interactions through the gaze of equity, weighing the power dynamics in past interactions with either the opposite sex or the same sex. Nonetheless, according to the National Institute of Health, in a college study with over two-thousand participants, there was no evidence of changes in the prevalence of sexual assault post-Me-Too. Had, then, the “Me too Movement failed”? Was its goal to simply to get women to catalogue their experiences over tea-time and late-night conversations with their closest confidants? Or was its goal to prompt people to not only remember, but then to testify and then to get retribution for either perceived or real harassment and assault? In this age of the guru or in this age of going viral, personality, one could argue, has ...
Read more

In vs Out

 Every once and a while these quora posts come up on my gmail feed. Some of these post are really interesting; there’s shit like did prince Phillip have affairs on Queen Elizabeth or if the US changed the constitution could it take your guns, and then there is the posts about the army. Navy seal trainers are interesting. These niggas or crackers, if I may, undergo a series arduous mental tasks and challenges that are made to break them and eventually get them to run on pure adrenaline almost, like robots.  But then I think what they training them so hard for. Most of the world doesn’t have the man power, fire power, not mental prowess to counter that. So what are these robots being trained for? Hmm, the more I think about it the more I get afraid you know.  The more I read about them and mermaids, dragons, Simpson’s, Selena and Disney I start getting overwhelmed. Damn, do I get my boat now. Do I stack up the pantry now?  A few years ago, the United States decided to ...
Read more

Niece

Growing up, my niece used to say she was ill all the time. I thought she was faking it. She never looked sick. She’d miss a day of school and then be skipping around the house. But then she got her tonsils taken out. Then her mom says she stopped breathing once. Okay. I lived with her my whole life and never experienced this. Years later, although she never caught an asthma attack at home or at school, all of a sudden she had asthma. Then all of a sudden her stomach starting hurting her. Then all of a sudden she had constipation. Then all of a sudden she’s known as being ill, and Univesity of Florida is emailing her all the time for this survey.  Hmm, did God’s angels press the right buttons. Are they doing the mirror effect here? The 48 laws of power  says there’s no greater weapon than the mirror effect. It infuriates your enemies. It buys you enough time to do what you are trying to do, and it shows them the value of their righteousness.  Now, I’ve been going from job ...
Read more